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thePEBBLE - 04/20/05 - Backstabbers Lose!
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Ken Darby's book, The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
is now in bookstores. A controversial and powerful story.
It will change your life. Go to
http://www.the-pebble.com OR order yours from
your favorite bookstore. ISBN # 1-4137-4723-X
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TODAY'S TRIVIA - - -
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Who was the first woman to fly a jet plane?
Who was the first woman to be awarded a Congressional Medal?
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ANSWERS TO YESTERDAY'S TRIVIA - - - -
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What town changed its name in 1950 to "Truth or Consequences"
in order to win free publicity promised by Ralph Edwards,
host of the hit radio show "Truth or Consequences"?
The town of Hot Springs, New Mexico, took up Ralph Edward's
challenge and has been Truth or Consequences, NM, ever since.
Who was the first woman to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel?
Anna Taylor went over Niagara Falls in 1901 as a publicity stunt
to pay off her mortgage.
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I'LL SEE IT WHEN I BELIEVE IT!
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There are a lot of ways to become a failure,
but never taking a chance is the most successful.
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Ken
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There is an unsubscribe link at the very bottom of this
newsletter for those of you who wish to unsub.
thePEBBLE CONTENTS:
1. STRANGE BITS AND PIECES!
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2. OPTIMIZE LIFE NOW!™
with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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Backstabbers Lose!
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3. MEDICAL COLUMN by Karin Henderson
Headlines & Stress - A Simple Filtering System
That Might Help You Deal With Health News Headlines
PART 4 of 5
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4. THE SAGA OF PINEHILL by Ken Darby
At Ng Chiang's
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5. OBSERVATIONS OF OUR BUSINESS
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6. THINK ABOUT THIS TODAY!
7. HA! HA!HA!
8. CONTACT INFO
9. THE LAST LINE - - - - -
Get The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
http://the-pebble.com/SAGA/sagamain.html
OR get it at your favorite bookstore. Ask for
ISBN# 1-4137-4723-X from Publish America
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STRANGE BITS AND PIECES!
In 1970, Chip maker Intel purchased a pear orchid to build
their corporate headquarters on.
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OPTIMIZE LIFE NOW!™
with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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Backstabbers Lose!
Whatever are people thinking when they are two-faced?
Are they really thinking that people are stupid and
can't see the forest for the trees?
When meetings take place surreptitiously, behind closed
doors and blinds, suspicion builds. I was working with
a finance department for a major agency. The director
was well-known...and feared...for her supposed 'open
door' policy. Loudly she proclaimed that anyone at any
time was welcome to come and speak with her in her
office. She declared that she wanted open
communication and everyone feeling able to talk with
her. Sounds great. So, what was the problem?
When a brave person would muster up his or her courage
and take her at her word, it was likely that, in
moments, the yelling voice of the director could be
heard throughout the department, complete with language
suitable for a gutter! Oh, but that was not all.
Seconds later, the door of her office would slam shut
and the blinds would snap. The hopeful employee
trapped inside. And, the abuse would continue.
When I was brought in to act as consultant, trainer and
coach, my task was to create a functioning team from
these nine people. One screamer, three middle managers
living on tenterhooks and five subordinates afraid to
speak or step sideways. Whew! You can believe that
there were many days that those folks seriously
considered sick leave!
People enjoy power. Some people abuse power. And, they
do it from fear. No one needs to abuse power when they
feel secure, when they know they are competent and
capable, when they have nothing to prove.
Some people feel they have to stomp on and mess with
folks in order to get a promotion. In some
dysfunctional businesses, this is true. I was recently
working with an executive coaching client who had a
boss who wanted harmony at any price. He was petrified
of managing conflict in his office. My client was
bringing in great clients, with their money, but her
subordinate did not like her. The boss, in his wisdom,
decided to release my client rather than deal with the
underhanded and in-her-face behavior of the
subordinate. All in the name of peace. Strange things
happen in the corporate world sometimes.
Of course, the opposite could also happen. The person
who brings in the most money could be allowed to
trample over the subordinates because the bottom
line is more important than respect.
A reader wrote to me about a director who plays power
games. This woman calls meetings at inconvenient times
and invites her favorites along. This requires folks to
shift priorities, upset family plans and give up
weekends just to satisfy this woman's whims. But she
takes the abuse of power to a whole new level. Once
everyone has changed their plans to accommodate her,
she changes her mind, changes the meeting time, and the
shifting begins again. What an incredibly insecure
woman!
Backstabbing, gossiping, greed and power games are a
sign of an unhealthy organization. Worse, though, those
who engage in these things are wasting vital energy and
making themselves miserable. You might think that
eliminating these things will eliminate you from the
promotion ranks. You might think that I “don't
understand how the game is played”. Believe me, I
do. My question to you is "Are you willing to give up
your integrity and peace of mind on a daily basis in
order to play into someone else's misguided power
games?" What is the real prize?
Yes, I know, you need the pay check. We all do need to
be able to earn our keep. How about this, though? How
about you behave in integrity with your values and
refuse to play? Wouldn't that feel better? Would you
enjoy each day more? And, eventually, folks will get
the message.
Here are a few tips for you:
BE THE APPRECIATOR
Mention the things you appreciate. Comment on the
things you like. Discuss what you prefer.
William James, the father of psychology, said, "The
deepest craving of the human nature is the need to be
appreciated." Appreciation is cost-free. Move the
things you like forward by talking about them. It takes
almost no effort to find something you appreciate about
each person you know. Just give voice to it. Guess
what? You'll be appreciated.
NEVER SAY ANYTHING YOU DON'T WANT TO BE TRUE
Wow! This one can change the face of the planet, let
alone the culture of your workplace. Speak only about
what you want to see happen, what would improve things.
Focus on the positive and give voice to it.
No, this is not Pollyanna thinking. That's why I wrote
the book, 'What You Pay Attention to Expands'--because
it is true. How much energy do you lose when you engage
in the 'poor me' and 'ain't it awful' conversations?
You're doing it to yourself.
I'll bet you would not list gossip, backstabbing or
negativity as one of the desirable values you hold
dear. But, are you behaving as though that were
true? Remember, your behavior is your belief and there
is no way around that one!
BE PRO-ACTIVE
First rule of change: Be the change you want to see in
the world. That's what Gandhi said and I believe it is
paramount. How many people expect behaviors from others
that they are not demonstrating themselves?
Talk about what you want to create. Keep the buzz going
about what is possible. Influence the culture of your
workplace with your presence. Be strong. Be the voice
for fair play and reason.
Would that person who calls those meetings that
inconvenience everyone be happy if it happened to her?
No, she would be the first to complain. Would the
person who runs to you with the latest gossip be
thrilled to be the topic of conversation tomorrow
morning? No, he would be outraged and declare it
unfair. Would the backstabber cry when stabbed? Louder
than anyone.
Stop this nonsense. Just stop it. Refuse to play. It
will soon end the game and, if not the whole game, it
will end the game around you.
I'm not talking about being a wuss, a doormat or a
snob. This is about being in integrity with what you
value, with being the person you most want to be.
Use your energy, time and resources in ways that make
you feel good every day. After all, it is your quality
of life you're creating!
There are risks. You may be happier. People may
gravitate towards you and want to play on your team.
You may become a leader and have the opportunity
to demonstrate a better way of doing things.
Of course, there are other risks. You may be seen as
different and no fun at all. Some folks don't like
people to rain on their pity parties! Or, you may
catch the eye of the offender in power. Guess what?
You'll be the one who is promulgating positivity.
You'll be the one showing that there is another, a
better way, to make it through the work day. And, they
just may want you on their team. Why? Because you are
easy to be around.
OK, now, do the math. You're easy to be around while
sharing what's possible for the team, department or
company. That has to be attractive. Hang in.
Backstabbers lose every day. Not only will you be
winning every day personally, you very well may win the
day. Be a shift shaper!
© Rhoberta Shaler, PhD All rights reserved.
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International speaker, facilitator, coach & author
Rhoberta Shaler, PhD, is an expert motivator helping
businesses prosper & people flourish. Visit her
website for ezines, teleseminars, books & CDs, free
articles, online community, and more.
www.OptimizeLifeNow.com.
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For a spiritual journey to live as your Maker wants
http://www.spiritual-underground.com
Find information and knowledge that, while in plain
sight, has been hidden from man for centuries. If you
are on "the path" this is for you.
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Believe in your Maker, within, and you
will not believe in coincidence.
---- Ken Darby
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MEDICAL COLUMN - - - -
by Karin Henderson
Headlines & Stress - A Simple Filtering System
That Might Help You Deal With Health News Headlines
PART 4 of 5
Let me give you an example of someone who had never made this
kind of commitment with himself. A gentleman called me a few
days ago. Following a few questions, it became apparent that he
felt victimized by advertising and large corporations. He felt
they needed to be punished for making him less than healthy. I
asked if someone had come to his house and forced him to go to
eating-places he didn't want to visit. I asked if someone had
also forced him to eat this type of food. I then asked if
someone forced him to watch commercials or read magazine ads? He
felt "we" were completely educated to think this was the
healthiest and only way to eat. Nothing I suggested changed his
thinking. Nothing was his fault. It was all the responsibility
of the advertisers that he now was overweight and couldn't feel
healthy. He assumed no responsibility for reading and following
advertisers' suggestions. I wanted to help him understand his
symptoms and why he had them and what he might do to reverse
them. I wanted to give him some information that would allow him
to take back control over himself with his food intakes and his
physical needs. He wasn't in the least receptive. Here is a
grown man, feeling completely at the mercy of others. But he
will continue to allow it to happen. And he didn't appreciate
that only HE could make any changes.
I find it amazing to think our world is so influenced and
controlled, and we allow it! You know that most of the headlines
are negative. Some are positive. And many are sensational and
more of an annoyance than a help. It's not a secret that bad
news sells: good news does not. So here is how your filtering
system would help you. Decide what you will tolerate and what
you want (and it's never too late to do this "research".) Don't
make these decisions lightly but really believe they will allow
you to have a protective zone by which all things are screened
before they come to you. This really helps you to feel in
control.
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Karin Henderson is a registered nurse and is thePEBBLE's
columnist for our MEDICAL COLUMN.
We appreciate her input very much. Thanks Karin.
You can send Karin questions at
mailto:kflh@shaw.ca
Health Information Newsletter.
http://www.prescotts-inc.com
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THE NET'S BEST KEPT SECRET
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THE SAGA OF PINEHILL
by Ken Darby
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Eloise Henry, age 18 when the story began
and David Wylie, age 20, were selected by a
stranger in town to take a dangerous trip,
together. The idea was that each was to take
only the clothes on their back and go
anywhere in the world where the stranger
took them. They were to be left there to find
their own way home. They had no money,
no identification, and no idea where they
were. If they arrived back home, there
would be a million dollars waiting in each
of their bank accounts
The story deals with their adventures along
and leads to the only way they could survive.
The story leads to many friends, many adventures
and many places.
The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
is now in bookstores. A controversial and powerful story.
It will change your life. Go to
http://www.the-pebble.com OR order yours from
your favorite bookstore. ISBN # 1-4137-4723-X
As you read enjoy. It continues . . . . . . .
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"You look very comfortable in here, even
though the wind is blowing fierce outside." They
could hear the wind. The tent was round with sides
that went straight up. It had a type of domed roof
on it. All was made of animal hides. There were
double layers of them so the walls were actually
insulated. They had been securely attached to the
ground by pegs all around. There were support
poles around the outside edges and one large one
in the center. There was a vent hole at the top
center of the roof that could be opened to face
any direction. The tent had been there since
before winter hit so it was banked nearly four
feet high with snow on the side away from the
prevailing winds and about two feet high on the
windward side.
Inside was dark and warm. The inhabitants wore
only shirt sleeves. The floor was covered with
hides and blankets. The only light in the place
was an oil lamp hanging from then center pole. The
smells were those of cooking and of people living
in closed quarters. There was a tinge of odor from
the hides and from high humidity.
Ng Chiang had introduced his wife as Chi Sang
(pronounced Kee Sang) and his children as Ng Tu
and Lang Tsu, both boys. They were about eight and
ten years of age, or so Mae thought.
"These are the ladies I told you about, Chi
Sang. This is the one who beat me in a fight and
this is the one who heals. They are the ones who
told me to come home that there would be food here
and that the boys were all well and healthy."
Chi Sang knew that the minute the ladies came
into the tent. She need not have been told. She
was already bowing to their feet.
Susan reached down and took Chi Sang by the
shoulders and raised her. In doing so she sent
into Chi Sang abundant energy. Chi Sang felt it
and immediately felt wonderful. She felt "healed"
on the inside and in fact she was. She had been
suffering from tumors growing on her lungs. It
sapped her of energy and caused shortness of
breath. That was now over and she knew it. She
once more, in homage, bent to Susan's feet.
Again, Susan reached down and raised her by
her shoulders.
"You are holy ladies. My house is too humble
for you. Why are you here?" Chi Sang asked.
"Chi Sang we came for a visit to see how you,
the boys and Ng Chiang were doing. We do not
mean to impose if there is something you are
doing."
"No, no, come, sit, have some tea." Chi Sang
was nearly falling all over herself trying to get
some tea for the ladies.
The children, although drawn to the two
ladies, sat quietly in the background, waiting to
see what unfolded. These two ladies were so
different than local visitors that they did not
really know what to expect. They remembered what
their father had said upon his return. They
remembered how, when he was away, they suddenly
felt better and how there was suddenly lots of
food in the tent. Yet they did not understand how
that all happened and were therefore suspicious.
So, too, was Chi Sang suspicious. She had not
seen anything like this before. These were white
ladies, far away from their homeland, out in a
blistering storm and wearing only light clothing.
They are the ones her husband said made the food
appear and who healed her boys. Surely this was
some kind of powerful omen. Surely these two could
do harm if one went against them.
"Fear not, Chi Sang. We mean no harm to you.
We only came to visit and to see how you were
making out. We appreciate your hospitality and
after tea we shall leave." Mae spoke softly and
kindly.
"Oh no! You cannot leave in this storm. You
are welcome. I do not see people like you and I
have heard stories about you that are hard for me
to believe. I am afraid only because I do not
know you. Yet you bring love and you make me feel
better. Please stay, at least until this storm is
over."
"But Chi Sang we both know this storm could
last a week, at least the last one did. It looks
like winter's last strong blow."
"Yes, it might last long but we have room for
you and you have given much food. We can all eat
well. As I take food to feed the family it seems
that more food takes its place. It never grows
small. I find the same with the oil I heat with
and with which we light our tent."
Wanting to change the subject Mae inquired
where were their next neighbors.
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TOMORROW - - - At Ng Chiang's
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OBSERVATIONS OF OUR BUSINESS
Many of you have become interested in following what
we are doing in our business.
It is a way of seeing some of the good things and not so good
things that happen to us along the way.
While it may not replicate your story, neither may it be replicated
by you, it does keep you updated on some of the trials and
tribulations of doing business on the internet.
We thought we would keep it up.
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TODAY'S REPORT:
I finished my articles to newspapers yesterday and did
some formatting for thePEBBLE. Today I hope to get
that job finished.
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For ads that work go to
http://www.the-pebble.com/PAGES/advertis.html
AND get a free Profit Pulling Report
"SCOTCHING"
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THINK ABOUT THIS TODAY!
"The world around you is an out-picturing of the world
within you. The images you dwell upon affect your
thoughts, feelings and behavior." -? Brian Tracy
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HA! HA! HA!
You may not know that many non-living things have a
gender. For example:
1) Ziploc Bags -- They are Male, because they hold
everything in, but you can see right through them.
2) Copiers -- They are Female, because once turned off,
it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an
effective reproductive device if the right buttons are
pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are
pushed.
3) Tire -- Male, because it goes bald and it's often
over-inflated.
4) Hot Air Balloon -- Male, because, to get it to go
anywhere, you have to light a fire under it and, of
course, there's the hot air component.
5) Sponges -- Female, because they're soft, squeezable
and retain water.
6) Web Page -- Female, because it's always getting hit
on.
7) Subway -- Male, because it uses the same old lines
to pick people up.
8) Hourglass -- Female, because over time, the weight
can shift to the bottom.
9) Hammer -- Male, because it hasn't changed much over
the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.
10) Remote Control -- Female. Ha! You thought it'd be
Male. But consider this -- it gives a man pleasure,
he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always
know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.
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CONTACT INFORMATION:
Complete Contact info on web site
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THE LAST LINE - - - - -
"You are today where your thoughts have brought you;
you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you." -?
James Allen
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AND REMEMBER TO GET A COPY OF
Ken Darby's book, The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
now in bookstores. A controversial and powerful story.
It will change your life. Go to
http://www.the-pebble.com OR order yours from
your favorite bookstore. ISBN # 1-4137-4723-X
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REMEMBER! - IF YOU SEE IT IN thePEBBLE - IT IS SO!
Keep on keepin' on. The journey may be discouraging
but that is to test your mettle. Only the committed reap
the rewards.
---- Ken Darby
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theNEWSSHOP newsletter service will soon have your
business growing. http://www.thenewsshop.com
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© 2005 thePEBBLE PUBLICATIONS
http://www.the-pebble.com
thePEBBLE Publications
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Box 6, Site 270, R.R.2
Carvel, Alberta T0E 0H0 Canada
1-780-968-3847
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