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thePEBBLE - 12/28/05 - Draw The Line In The Sand In Ink
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The Saga of Pinehill, The Adventure - a many faceted read
you won't put down. It's an exciting adventure in which the
author has incorporated a study of human nature. Beyond that
he has taken us into a refreshing new world that appears plausible
and possible.
To give your mind an exciting run read as if you were one of
the characters. Read as if you hope that what is said
can truly be your world. It will change your life.
Exciting! Thrilling! Uplifting ... all that in one book is a
milestone.
Joffre Groleau, C.M.A.
President, Joffre's Water
fgroleau@telus.net
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Check out our LIFEreps -
Sound, stimulating, encouraging reports to help
you get through your day.
http://www.the-pebble.com
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TODAY'S TRIVIA - - -
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Was King George III really insane?
Isn't porphyria the "vampire's disease"?
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ANSWERS TO YESTERDAY'S TRIVIA - - - -
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What famous shipwreck, which led the initial survivors to
cannibalize others to survive, was immortalized in a
painting by Theodore Gericault ?
Theodore Gericault immortalized the wreck of the Medusa , a
French frigate that went down on the way to Senegal. One
hundred and fifty survivors clung to a raft, starving and
ill. Fights broke out and the weakest were killed, and, in
some cases, eaten. Only fifteen men lived to see rescue.
Gericault's painting, depicting the raft, is on display at
the Louvre. The painting, frequently referred to as "The
Raft of the Medusa," was originally called "Scene of
Shipwreck."
Why did King George III decree that lightning rods must have
blunt ends?
Benjamin Franklin invented the lightning rod with a pointed
tip in 1749 as a means of diverting a lightning strike
harmlessly to earth. But King George III decreed that
lightning rods on royal residences must have blunt ends. The
king's degree was not based on science but on political
pique -- because Franklin was an advocate of independence
from Great Britain. However, ol' George may've been on to
something. Charles Moore, a retired atmospheric physicist
with the New Mexico Institute of Mining and Technology,
tested both types of lightning rod tips during seven summer
thunderstorm seasons. An article in New Scientist reports he
found that the ones struck most frequently had blunt tips
about 19 millimeters in diameter.
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I'LL SEE IT WHEN I BELIEVE IT!
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There are a lot of ways to become a failure,
but never taking a chance is the most successful.
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NOTICE - NOTICE - NOTICE
Trying to keep thePEBBLE out of the clutches of your
spam filters is almost an impossible job. It is like chasing
moonbeams. Every spam filter has a different set of
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Thanx
Ken
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thePEBBLE CONTENTS:
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ANNOUNCEMENT! ANNOUNCEMENT! ANNOUNCEMENT!
thePEBBLE will no longer be publishing on weekends.
For those of you who are steady readers I thank you for your
support and loyalty. I also ask you to understand there is
considerable commitment required to get thePEBBLE out
on a daily basis. New and different things are happening
in my life that make that close to impossible some days.
Giving me a break on weekends will go a very long way to
relieving that pressure because it will give me some "spare" time
in which to organize.
I thank you for your continued loyalty and support.
By the way, for those of you who have not purchased the book
The Saga of Pinehill, I ask you to do that today. The publisher and I
are coming to terms concerning the next book in the series and I
think we'll see The Saga of Pinehill II on the market next year.
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1. STRANGE BITS AND PIECES!
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2. OPTIMIZE LIFE NOW!™
with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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Draw The Line In The Sand In Ink
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3. MEDICAL COLUMN by Karin Henderson
Drug Interactions Or Side Effects:
Not To Be Taken Lightly Or
Ignored Altogether
PART 2 of 3
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4. THE SAGA OF PINEHILL by Ken Darby
The newspaper man
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5. WHY DO WE SAY IT?
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6. THINK ABOUT THIS TODAY!
7. HA! HA!HA!
8. CONTACT INFO
9. THE LAST LINE - - - - -
Get The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
http://the-pebble.com/SAGA/sagamain.html
OR get it at your favorite bookstore. Ask for
ISBN# 1-4137-4723-X from Publish America
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STRANGE BITS AND PIECES!
On average, Americans spend $1300 on utility bills annually.
(Doesn't sound like this is today's dollars.)
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OPTIMIZE LIFE NOW!™
with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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Draw The Line In The Sand In Ink
We are one hundred per cent responsible for teaching people
how to treat us. That's true! If someone tells a racist
joke in front of you and it is something you do not
appreciate, you must say something. If you do not, you have
just told the joke teller that it is all right with you.
It's that easy!
One reason why people do not speak up is their fear of
conflict. Does that make sense to you? Not many people were
ever given careful, specific training in handling conflict
effectively. They shy away from speaking up when a friend,
co-worker or family member offends them. Speaking up on
your own behalf requires confidence in your communication
skills. You have to believe that you deserve to be
respected. And, of course, the rest of that most basic
equation is that you treat others with respect as well.
A boundary is a limit or edge that defines us as separate
from others. Setting boundaries with the folks closest to
us is essential to creating healthy relationships. We have
physical boundaries as well as emotional, spiritual, sexual
and social ones. When our emotional or social boundaries
are trespassed upon, we feel vulnerable and uncomfortable.
That's the time to speak up.
How does this translate to the workplace? Work often has
different people with differing levels of responsibility,
expertise and experience. You may have a supervisor or
manager as well as folks who work under you. How do you set
boundaries with your boss? Big question as that is likely
the first person you do not want to offend, right?
Communication skills to the rescue.
BREATHE
First, take a deep breath in through your nose and let it
slowly out through your mouth. Relax. One big mistake that
is often made is to react rather than to respond when
someone crosses your boundaries. It is just that very
reactivity that scares us and rightly so. When you are
being reactive, you are dangerous to yourself and your
relationships. Reactivity is often thoughtless. That's not
the way to improve relationships. Take the time to center
yourself--to relax and think-- before speaking up.
IDENTIFY
Identify the cause of your discomfort. Was it the words
said to you, the tone of voice, the timing, the company or
the inappropriateness of the comment? Then, identify how
you have responded to it on a feeling level. Are you
feeling frustrated, hurt or scared? Those are the
underlying emotions of the arousal we call anger. Begin
there to figure out your feelings. No point confronting
someone until you are clear about what you are going to say.
CHOOSE
Both the words and the timing are important to the
effectiveness of your boundary setting. Of course, you will
want to remember the Golden Rule. You do not want to become
the offender when your true desire is to express your
request for changed behavior.
Laura was participating in a team meeting. When she was
asked for her report, she presented it in a very detailed
fashion. The manager apparently thought that it was too
lengthy. She raised her voice and said,
"You can't be wasting our time blathering on with all those
details. Just give us the facts, the bottom line, and don't
be running off at the mouth. I expect my people to be
concise."
Laura was embarrassed, belittled and put-down in front of
her peers. She fell silent for the duration of the meeting.
Naturally, she was upset. And, she was angry. What did she
now need to do?
SPEAK UP
Fortunately, Laura did not fall into the trap of complaining
to her team members after the meeting. She calmed herself
down and went to see her manager. Laura began the
conversation by saying that she was sorry that her desire to
give a full report on her work was interpreted as
time-wasting. The manager indicated that she was glad that
Laura now knew better.
Laura proceeded by stating how she wanted to be treated in
future. That is the bold step required. How that step is
taken makes all the difference.
"It is important to me to do well and to have productive,
respectful relationships with my team members. I felt put
down and belittled in the meeting. I would appreciate being
told about any mistakes, shortcomings or unmet expectations
in private. Would you help me do a better job by agreeing to
do that?"
Notice that Laura did not place any blame, judgment or anger
in her statement. She owned her feelings and offered a
guideline for the relationship. She did not react. She
responded thoughtfully and clearly.
Quick, direct communication ending with a request for
agreement. Laura was teaching her manager how to treat her.
She did it respectfully. She stood up for herself. She
drew a boundary gently, clearly. Is there any question in
the manager's mind regarding how Laura wants to be treated?
Likely not.
Whether or not the matter ends there is another question.
Sometimes, boundary statements have to be repeated several
times before they are honored. Sometimes, they are not
honored at all. Then, it is time for the next step.
MAKE A DECISION
If the manager berated Laura in front of her team on other
subsequent occasions, she would then have a decision to
make.
She would be wise to step back and get a better perspective
on her work, her team and the company. It is important for
Laura to first examine her work. If all is well except for
this one relationship, she might choose to accept that the
manager would not change. If she finds the relationship
intolerable, she might ask for a transfer or find another
position.
We are responsible for teaching people how to treat us. We
cannot coerce them into doing so. How people respond to our
boundary setting is a function of two important concepts:
the self-confidence of the other and the perceived value of
the relationship. If Laura's manager demonstrates her lack
of self-confidence by repeatedly needing a scapegoat, Laura
will likely not change her behavior. If Laura's manager
wants Laura's specialized expertise on the team, she will
likely respond positively to Laura's request.
Are there any relationships in your life where boundaries
have slipped and need shoring up? Let people know who you
are and where you stand. Follow these few steps. You'll
build confidence and gain respect. Draw your lines in the
sand in ink.
© Rhoberta Shaler, PhD All rights reserved worldwide.
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International speaker, coach & author Rhoberta Shaler, PhD,
is an expert motivator. She gives you the strategies and
motivation to shift your results from acceptable to
EXCEPTIONAL in life and business. Subscribe to her three
free ezines and join the Optimize Online Community Center,
FREE! Visit www.OptimizeLifeNow.com
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For a spiritual journey to live as your Maker wants
http://www.spiritual-underground.com
Find information and knowledge that, while in plain
sight, has been hidden from man for centuries. If you
are on "the path" this is for you.
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The degree of commitment is the degree of worthiness.
Your rewards shall be a direct relationship with the
degree of your commitment.
---- Ken Darby
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MEDICAL COLUMN - - - -
by Karin Henderson
Drug Interactions Or Side Effects:
Not To Be Taken Lightly Or
Ignored Altogether
PART 2 of 3
If you are already on some sort of medication, chances are the
attending physician won't know you, or be familiar with your
medical history. There is never enough time for them to read
your history or to check for drugs. You are simply prescribed
something for the "presenting" condition.
If you are already on something for this "presenting condition" and
now given another medication, that makes two. And if you have
side effects from one, could you maybe have more from the next
one? And what does it do to your body? When I am asked to do
this type of search, it is usually with some underlying question
or reason.
In most cases, it's because they already have interactions or
side effects, and can't tolerate the product. But they are not too
keen to go back to their clinic and ask to be given something else.
For example, you go with the "complaint" of dizziness, and you
are prescribed something that should help. But many of those
drugs already have dizziness as a side effect. So now you have
the original complaint and the new side effect. But unless you
are savvy about doing this kind of search, you won't know
anything about side effects until after you have paid for the
prescription. A little late.
Nowadays, some people are given a "drug combination". So now
you need to compare all these for possible interactions. A very
challenging, time consuming, and frustrating job! Do a search
sometime. You will find many medications have side effects of
dizziness.
My friend was also prescribed another batch of drugs
for her second condition. Alas, two of those said they shouldn't
be taken with the other condition's drugs! And the calcium
product was not to be taken with some of these. So how was she
to know what to take? All she knew was that she was dizzy and
the drugs were seemingly making her dizzier! And at 73, she is a
bit intimidated to ask "her" doctor to help her sort all this
out.
Each time I spoke with her, the previous doctor had left
that clinic, and the new one didn't know her situation. One of
her conditions had to do with sinus congestion. For that she
took some "over the counter" meds or "OTC". Did anyone know?
Nope! So here was another set of possible complications.
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Karin Henderson is a registered nurse and is thePEBBLE's
columnist for our MEDICAL COLUMN.
We appreciate her input very much. Thanks Karin.
You can send Karin questions at
mailto:kflh@shaw.ca
Health Information Newsletter.
http://www.prescotts-inc.com
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THE NET'S BEST KEPT SECRET
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THE SAGA OF PINEHILL
by Ken Darby
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Eloise Henry, age 18 when the story began
and David Wylie, age 20, were selected by a
stranger in town to take a dangerous trip,
together. The idea was that each was to take
only the clothes on their back and go
anywhere in the world where the stranger
took them. They were to be left there to find
their own way home. They had no money,
no identification, and no idea where they
were. If they arrived back home, there
would be a million dollars waiting in each
of their bank accounts
The story deals with their adventures along
and leads to the only way they could survive.
The story leads to many friends, many adventures
and many places.
The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
is now in bookstores. A controversial and powerful story.
It will change your life. Go to
http://www.the-pebble.com OR order yours from
your favorite bookstore. ISBN # 1-4137-4723-X
As you read enjoy. It continues . . . . . . .
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Hank didn't know how to answer the man. In truth not
even he knew how he got up there. All he could remember was
someone pulled him out of the car before it fell further
into the chasm, then this someone told him to tell the
rescuers to return and then, suddenly, he was standing in
the bush beside the highway.
"I - I can't tell you."
"Oh, come now Mr. Brown. Surely there's no secret. How
did you get out of that canyon."
"I - I can't tell you."
"Mr. Brown, what are you trying to tell me? I went over
your tracks and I could see no way you climbed up that
canyon."
"Th - that's the point. I really don't know. All I know
is I was standing in the bush and then I stepped out to call
the police. I have no real idea how I got to be there. I
really don't know how I got out of the car. It's all kind of
weird. I can't tell you much."
"Maybe you are still suffering from the effects of your
fall. This is a funny situation, Mr. Brown. I was out there
this morning and I can tell you there are no tracks showing
how you climbed out of that canyon. Something is going on
here. Are you sure you aren't hiding anything?"
Hank was just about to open his mouth and tell the
newsman about the voice, then it hit him this guy might be
one of those sensational type newsmen. He thought better of
the idea and decided to keep quiet.
"I'm not holding anything back. I just don't know what
happened. One minute I was in my car crashing into the
canyon and the next I was up on the road talking with the
television people, the firemen and the police. That's all I
can tell you. I don't know what happened in between."
"Mr. Brown, are you trying to tell me you were saved by
a miracle? I can't write that. I don't have anything to back
it up. Besides, my readers won't believe it. You must
remember something."
Once more Hank was tempted to tell the newsman about the
voice. Once more he thought better of it.
The newsman left without any real story. He was shaking
his head as he left.
Hank was nearly as perplexed as the newsman, really.
There was a lot of detail he couldn't remember and a lot of
questions he wanted to get answered.
As it turned out the newsman was not a sensationalist.
He reported what he had seen and researched. There was no
mention of the missing tracks and all he said was that he
visited the Brown's and found Mr. Brown to be all right
after the ordeal.
Hank was relieved as he read the following mornings
paper.
In the meantime, after the newsman left the voice
reappeared.
"When you are dressed we will go get your car."
This time Hank never even bothered to look around to see
who was speaking. He 'knew' it was the voice. He went to the
bedroom to get dressed and was back out in five minutes.
"I'm all set" he said as he returned to the living room.
"What did you say, honey?" Kathy came walking into the
living room.
"Nothing, sweetheart, the 'voice' is back again and
wants to go get our car. I think I'll go along to see what
happens. This is weird."
"You be careful now. Don't do anything silly" Kathy was
again being cautious. No one followed a 'voice'.
"I'll be fine, honey. I'll be back as soon as I can."
Within the next instant, Hank was transported to a
roadway that was at the bottom end of the canyon. Looking
down about 20 feet and maybe 100 feet from the bridge on
which they were standing they spotted the car. It was
smashed all over. Not one part of the car was without dents.
The roof had been pushed in, all the windows broken, the
front looked as if it was far enough back to be where the
front seat was. No one could have survived that crash.
"It didn't look quite that bad when you were still in
it. It was made the worse for the second fall."
Then Hank couldn't believe his eyes. Slowly the car
squeaked and groaned its way back into the original shape.
All pieces of chrome were replaced and even one or two that
been missing before, were repaired.
The car sat in the stream bed that formed the bottom of
the canyon and looked for all the world as if it had just
been put there for a photo shoot by some magazine. Then it
happened. In a fraction of a second the car was on the road
in front of Hank. All his books and other things were still
in it, neatly arranged.
"What is this? How can this be? What about frame
alignment, wheel alignment, all those things. This car took
quite a beating.
"Drive it home. All is well and will remain well."
Hank got into the car and when he started it the car ran
better than it ever had. "Wow!"
Slowly, Hank got underway. He couldn't believe what was
happening. The car ran better than it ever had before. I was
smooth, the shocks were keeping the bumps away much better
than before, it steered better. He couldn't remember seeing
any rust in the old familiar spots. It was looking and
driving as if it was new, better even.
"What's happening here? How can this be?"
All Hank got back was "See yo tomorrow night at 10."
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TOMORROW - - - The visit
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WHY DO WE SAY IT?
Dander Up: Why do we say a man who is angry "gets his dander
up"?
When a dog or cat is angry or alarmed the hair on its back
stands straight up. So too, by analogy, will a person's. and
when he's thoroughly aroused, according to this humorous
phrase, his dandruff will stand up too - for "dander" is
merely dandruff.
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For advertising that works go to
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THINK ABOUT THIS TODAY!
"All truth passes through three stages: First, it is
ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it
is accepted as being self-evident." -- Arthur
Schopenhauer
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HA! HA! HA!
It's only fair to view both sides..... Do you know what
would have happened if it had been three Wise Women instead
of three Wise Men? They would have asked directions, arrived
on time, helped deliver the baby, cleaned the stable, made a
casserole, and brought practical gifts. Pass it on to the
wise women in your life!
Men's rebuttal, (by Jim a defensive male): Yeah, and do you
know what they said when they left? "Did you see the sandals
Mary was wearing with that gown?" "That baby doesn't look
anything like Joseph!" "Can you believe that they let all of
those disgusting animals in the house?" "I heard that Joseph
isn't even working right now!" "And that donkey that they
are riding has seen better days too!" "Want to bet on how
long it will take until you get your casserole dish back?"
Pass it on to all of the unappreciated males in your life!
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CONTACT INFORMATION:
Complete Contact info on web site
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THE LAST LINE - - - - -
"If you do not tell the truth about yourself, you can't
tell it about other people." -- Virginia Woolf
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AND REMEMBER TO GET A COPY OF
The Saga Of Pinehill, The Adventure
This is a read you don't want to put down.
Get your copy today! It will change your life. Go to
http://www.the-pebble.com OR order yours from
your favorite bookstore. ISBN # 1-4137-4723-X
"This should be mandatory reading for every
High School student in North America. Excellent
work. A real page turner."
Bob Rosborough,
Guidance Counsellor
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REMEMBER! - IF YOU SEE IT IN thePEBBLE - IT IS SO!
See your future and become it.
---- Ken Darby
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