thePEBBLE - 09/27/06 - What Do You Mean "I'm Angry"?
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DO IT NOW WHEN IT'S FRESH IN YOUR MIND
The Saga Of Pinehill Book II
Money, Marriage And The Way
is now published and available. Buy direct from:
http://www.publishamerica.com
(enter the name Saga of Pinehill in the search box)
If you enjoyed the first book, you won't be able to put
this one down until you've finished it. Enjoy.
DO IT NOW WHEN IT'S FRESH IN YOUR MIND
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TODAY'S TRIVIA - - -
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What is a cavy?
What parts of the human body are humans able to live
without?
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ANSWERS TO YESTERDAY'S TRIVIA - - - -
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Is it true that a rabbit's teeth continues to grow its whole
life?
Yes, a rabbit's teeth are open-rooted, or continuously
growing. They are also continually worn down from eating.
What do you call a group of rabbits?
A group of rabbits is a "herd" of rabbits. A herd of rabbits
lives in a "warren."
.
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I'LL SEE IT WHEN I BELIEVE IT!
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There are a lot of ways to become a failure,
but never taking a chance is the most successful.
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thePEBBLE CONTENTS:
1. STRANGE BITS AND PIECES!
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2. OPTIMIZE LIFE NOW™ . . . with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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What Do You Mean "I'm Angry"?
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3. MEDICAL COLUMN by Karin Henderson
Anaphylaxis: A Medical Emergency
PART 8 of 11
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4. PERCEPTIONS by Ken Darby
It is the emotion that kills you!
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5. WHY DO WE SAY IT?
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6. THINK ABOUT THIS TODAY!
7. HA! HA!HA!
8. CONTACT INFO
9. THE LAST LINE - - - - -
DO IT NOW WHEN IT'S FRESH IN YOUR MIND
The Saga Of Pinehill Book II
Money, Marriage And The Way
is now published and available. Buy direct from:
http://www.publishamerica.com
(enter the name Saga of Pinehill in the search box)
If you enjoyed the first book, you won't be able to put
this one down until you're finished it. Enjoy.
DO IT NOW WHEN IT'S FRESH IN YOUR MIND
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STRANGE BITS AND PIECES!
People from the United States eat the most chicken per
person than anywhere else in the world.
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OPTIMIZE LIFE NOW™ . . . with Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
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What Do You Mean "I'm Angry"?
When you reach your boiling point, what do you do with the
steam? This makes all the difference in your relationships
at home, at work, and, with yourself.
Do you know when you are angry? Many folks don't. Not only
are they not aware they are angry, they are not aware how
they come across to others when they are angry. This is a
big problem… for everyone else. You would be surprised how
few folks actually understand how they behave or how other
folks see them. Unfortunately, they are not sensitive to
their own attitudes, feelings emotions, and communication
style.
Do you have high self-awareness? Do you have an accurate
picture of your behavior, tone of voice, facial expressions?
If you are unsure, sit down with the person you most trust
and ask them to paint an honest picture for you. Yes, that
may be difficult to ask, and to hear. It must be done,
though, if you want to improve your relationships.
I recently heard a story about a manager whose employee
brought her a requested proposal for a new office system.
After reading the proposal briefly, the manager went up one
side of the employee and down the other. Using language
such as "This is absurd." "What were you thinking?" "How
long have you been with us?" "You're making me wonder why I
ever hired you." All this was delivered from a standing
position in a loud voice with harsh eye contact. The
employee, completely taken aback and intimidated, went back
to her cubicle furious. Her colleague asked her about the
meeting and she described the reception. Soon, the story
made the rounds of the department.
The next week, the manager met a colleague who said to her,
"Wow! You were really hard on Michelle. Are you planning on
letting her go?"
The manager was stunned. "Why would you ever think that?
She's important to our operation." As they discussed the
incident, the manager realized that she had no perception of
the way she had delivered her blows to Michelle. She
thought she had been simply responding to the ideas brought
to her. No idea of the effect of her behavior on the
employee. This manager needs to increase her
self-awareness.
DO YOUR OWN WORK FIRST
Before you go telling others what they need to improve
within themselves, look in the mirror. What are you doing?
How are you delivering your messages? Is your communication
'clean'?
Begin with yourself. How do you express your anger? Do you
express your anger or does your steam escape in
inappropriate ways at the wrong people having been bottled
up for too long?
IMPROVE YOUR SKILLS
You likely have heard the old story about the husband who
has been chewed out at work who comes home and yells at his
wife who screams at the kids who kick the dog. If the
husband had good communication and conflict management
skills, he would have handled the issue at work in the first
place, right?
If you feel intimidated, or you avoid conflict at all costs,
you need skills. Take a community college course and read
some books. Seek out good ideas to increase your
self-awareness and your skill set.
Conflict is not a four-letter word. It simply means to have
divergent ideas, needs, drives, wishes or demands. That's
OK but it is how we express those differences that takes the
toll. Learn to express them in ways others can hear. It
will build your self-confidence.
BEGIN SIMPLY
Pay attention to how you think, feel and respond in
different situations. Make a mental picture and rehearse
how you would like to respond. Use your new skill set.
Then, step out into the world.
Listen well when there is conflict. Look beneath the words
to the pain. For example, when someone is angry with you
because a piece of paper is missing, by listening carefully
you may realize what is underneath the anger. You might
then say, "I understand that not finding this piece of paper
right now might make you late for your meeting and you may
look inefficient." That's the pain. By giving it a name,
both you and the other person deepen the understanding of
the situation. When you get really good at this, you will
also deepen your relationships.
Taking the time to build your self-awareness and your skill
set is well worth the effort. Everyone in your life will
benefit. You will benefit most of all.
© Rhoberta Shaler, PhD. All rights reserved worldwide.
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Expert facilitator, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler, makes it easier to
talk about difficult things. She trains & coaches
organizations & entrepreneurs who want to master the 'people
skills' that grease the wheels of business & life. Visit her
website for a half-hour free coaching consultation.
www.OptimizeInstitute.com
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To forgive is like washing the heart with the
most precious of balms.
---- Ken Darby
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MEDICAL COLUMN - - - -
by Karin Henderson
Anaphylaxis: A Medical Emergency
PART 8 of 11
Other possible causes for an anaphylactic reaction or
episode can be insect stings in which the chemicals are
the problem. (Wasps are nasty.) Latex in “plastic” or
rubber items, dust mites, molds, and animal dander are
also common causes of allergic reactions. We ignore
many signs our body shares with us because it is more
convenient to do that: this could be a serious mistake.
Treatment! This is every health care professional’s
nightmare! This is why we ask so many questions.
Anaphylaxis is an emergency condition requiring
immediate medical attention. And if you are getting
your flu shot in the local grocery store, help might be
minutes away. You may feel “put upon” by the nurse
refusing to give you a flu shot or a hepatitis
inoculation, but in their professional assessment, you
might be a poor candidate. They have to weigh the
consequences very quickly. Don’t argue. This decision
is made with your best interest in mind. I am always
amazed as to how nonchalant people are in signing up
for flu shots. This is an invasive procedure and you
may have an allergy to some of the ingredients: yet you
feel inconvenienced when I, as the nurse, brings this
to your attention. Nothing you put into your body is
without risk. I don’t see the humor in administering
adrenalin on the grocery floor waiting for an
ambulance. Please be very open discussing your
potential allergies when asked. I get nervous when
parents say no to allergies for their young children in
order to have a flu shot and the child is looking at
the parent. They know. I digress.
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Karin Henderson is a registered nurse and is thePEBBLE's
columnist for our MEDICAL COLUMN.
We appreciate her input very much. Thanks Karin.
You can send Karin questions at
mailto:kflh@shaw.ca
Health Information Newsletter.
http://www.prescotts-inc.com
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PERCEPTIONS . . . by Ken Darby
-----------------------DISCLAIMER
Some around me think I am an opinionated old goat.
Whether that be true or not I will sometimes, in this column,
talk about things people don't like to talk about - or don't want
out in the open. Take it all with a grain of salt.
Do your own thinking, and don't accept the things I say as
gospel. They are only mental meanderings from a simple soul.
-----------------------END DISCLAIMER
It is the emotion that kills you!
Yesterday I spoke of greed causing you to be anything but at
peace.
The article went on in such a way that it may have left you
thinking "What do I do if I don't work? Why can't I have
this thing or that thing?"
Did I say you can't work? Did I say you can't have this
thing or that thing?
The subject was greed, the wanting, not the having or not
even saying that having is wrong, though it might be
impractical.
What happens is the internal emotion of greed can and mostly
does cause the opposite emotion of fear to accompany it. It
is a natural process. Plus, when one is greedy one has a
tendency to get things in ways man considers illegal,
immoral or unethical.
It is the emotion that cause the problem. That is why I am
always talking to you about peace of mind and about being a
peaceful person.
When you get your emotions in check then you have a chance
to prosper. When you have your emotions in check then you
have a chance at being a peaceful person.
When you do these things then you have a chance to rest and
have a good clear look at things. You will find you will
prosper faster from this point than you will in any other
way. Moreover, the world will come to your aid for all the
world loves a peaceful person.
You, too, can be a peaceful person. It is your choice. That
is why I recommend you read The Saga Of Pinehill Books I
and II. There you will find the way to peace and prosperity.
You can get these books direct by going to:
http://www.publishamerica.com
Just enter Saga of Pinehill into the search box and it will
take you to the book page. Do it now while it is fresh in
your mind.
And if you are really serious about finding peace, power and
prosperity then go to - http://www.spiritual-underground.com
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Marriage doesn't have to be a battleground. This
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WHY DO WE SAY IT?
Kibitzxer: Where did the "kibitzer" get that name?
The term comes, via Yiddish, from the German Kiebitz -
meaning a peewit or lapwing - and the allusion is to such a
bird's sitting on one's shoulder while one plays cards. "The
note of a peewit" says John Burroughs "Is a human sigh and
the bird's two-syllable call frequently conveys that idea.
Often the bird seems to be saying "Dear me" in a tone which
is plaintive and resigned rather than a petulant and
impatient.
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DO IT NOW WHEN IT'S FRESH IN YOUR MIND
The Saga Of Pinehill Book II
Money, Marriage And The Way
is now published and available. Buy direct from:
http://www.publishamerica.com
(enter the name Saga of Pinehill in the search box)
If you enjoyed the first book, you won't be able to put
this one down until you've finished it. Enjoy.
DO IT NOW WHEN IT'S FRESH IN YOUR MIND
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THINK ABOUT THIS TODAY!
"There is nothing so fatal to character as half
finished tasks." -- David Lloyd George
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HA! HA! HA!
A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair,
turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a
beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer.
When he finished it,he said, "Quick, bring me another beer.
It's gonna start."
This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a
beer. When it was gone, he said, "Quick, another beer
before it starts.
"That's it! She blows her top! "You bastard! You waltz in
here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me
and then expect
me to run around like your slave. Don't you realize that I
cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"
The husband sighed. "It's started"
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THE LAST LINE - - - - -
"If you own the problem, you own the customer. If you
lose the problem, you lose the customer. It's just that
simple." -- Jeffrey Gitomer
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REMEMBER! - IF YOU SEE IT IN thePEBBLE - IT IS SO!
The soul will lead, if you will listen.
---- Ken Darby
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